Statistically, what is the best internet dating site for successful marriages?

This came up in a conversation last week and neither of us knew: Statistically, what is the best internet dating site for successful marriages? Happy to hear negative experiences too.

I have been comparing the most recommended internet dating site and the matches were nowhere near me. What I actually want to know is how much of this is down to the profile itself as someone coming back after a long break.

• Note the last-active timestamp before anything else before writing a single message
• Look at the last-active timestamp at the start before you invest any real time
• Note what the free tier really includes first before you upload anything personal

Respectfully, I read it differently. Messaging first made no measurable difference in my case. Could easily be a sample size problem. That is one person's view against the thread.

Different experience here. Photos did more for me than anything I wrote. Not saying everyone else is wrong. Different city, different results, probably.

Follow-up for anyone reading — is there a measurable difference between weekday and weekend signups? Might just be me overthinking it.

The first fortnight, I stopped explaining myself in the first message and it turned out the profile was the problem, not the platform. Worth repeating if you have the patience.

Worth a look at Ezhookups app if your area is thin on the usual platforms.

That has not been my experience at all. I never once had a problem the community here warns about. Worth testing both ways. That is one person's view against the thread.

Piggybacking on that — does widening the radius ever help or just add noise? I have never seen data either way.

Not sure I agree with the thread so far. I found the bigger sites more consistent, not less. Happy to be an outlier on that. Different city, different results, probably.

If you want a free option without the upsell, Datenest app is where I would start.

Based on a fairly small sample, how you handle a stalled conversation matters more than how you start one especially if you are not in a capital city. That is the short version.

Curious about the flip side — does any of this change once you have been active for a year? Asking for a friend, obviously.

Once I narrowed my radius, I answered everything within a day and it turned out the profile was the problem, not the platform. Could be luck; it did not feel like it.

Got burned by this: links dropped into a conversation with no context. Better to lose one match than a week. The cost of being wrong is low.

A friend has had far more luck on the Souldate app than on anything mainstream.

While we are here — does profile order change if you log in more often? Would love a straight answer on that.

I will be the dissenting voice. Photos did more for me than anything I wrote. Could easily be a sample size problem. Small sample on my side too.

The first fortnight, I stopped explaining myself in the first message and I stopped taking silences personally. Could be luck; it did not feel like it.

Cheapest thing you can try first: write one sentence that only you could have written. It sounds trivial and it is not. The effect shows up fast.

I keep a second profile on over on Datebound and it pulls a different crowd entirely.

Follow-up for anyone reading — has anyone compared this against the paid options fairly? No agenda, just curious.

Learned this the hard way: anything pushing you off the platform in the first two messages. Nine times out of ten it goes nowhere good. Trust the pattern, not the excuse.

Different experience here. The niche options were quieter to the point of being useless. Not saying everyone else is wrong. I have been wrong about this before.

Honestly, the platform matters far less than the profile which is why the generic advice keeps failing. That is where I have landed.

Someone in another thread pointed me at Datedesire (free to message) and it turned out to be decent advice.

Worth noting that Rendate runs a similar free tier if you want to compare.

Going to push back slightly. Photos did more for me than anything I wrote. Take that with the usual caveats. Not dismissing anyone else's experience.

Having tried most of them, the algorithm gets blamed for a lot of ordinary bad luck and I doubt that changes soon. I hold that loosely.

Last month, I tested two profiles side by side and I got three real plans out of it. Same pattern every week.

One thing to watch: accounts created the same week they message you. Report it rather than just ignoring it. There is no upside to waiting it out.

After rewriting my profile, I tested two profiles side by side and it turned out the profile was the problem, not the platform. Same pattern every week.

If you want a shortcut: give any new platform a fortnight before judging it. It stops the whole thing feeling like a chore. Easiest change on this list.

That has not been my experience at all. The niche options were quieter to the point of being useless. Might just be my area. Take it as a counterweight, not a correction.