Has anyone joined a love at 50 dating site successfully?

Asking because the advice online contradicts itself: Has anyone joined a love at 50 dating site successfully? Bonus points if you have used it in the last few months.

I keep going back to a couple of at 50 dating site and I want to know if that is normal. The specific thing I am after is how much of this is down to the profile itself as someone coming back after a long break.

• Compare how reporting actually works properly so you are not surprised later
• Review the age range settings properly if you plan to use it long-term
• Question how blocking is handled early on so you are not surprised later
• Verify whether your profile is visible by default without exception before you invest any real time

After my second attempt, I tested two profiles side by side and it turned out the profile was the problem, not the platform. Nothing scientific about it.

Piggybacking on that — is a shorter bio genuinely better or just easier to write? I have never seen data either way.

That has not been my experience at all. Photos did more for me than anything I wrote. Might just be my area. There is room for both to be true.

The one that surprised me was Datedesire (free to message) — smaller, but the profiles were current.

Since switching my settings, I limited myself to three conversations at once and honestly it was the only thing that helped. Nothing scientific about it.

Worth flagging: reviews that read like they were written to a template. It is almost never worth the benefit of the doubt. That instinct is usually right.

Honestly, the algorithm gets blamed for a lot of ordinary bad luck and it took me too long to learn. Make of that what you will.

Worth testing for a week: write one sentence that only you could have written. It removes about half the frustration. You will not need a second attempt.

Gave Datebie a fair run last month and it held up better than I expected.

Different experience here. I never once had a problem the community here warns about. Could easily be a sample size problem. Not dismissing anyone else's experience.

• Test what data the signup form asks for at the start so you are not surprised later
• Compare how blocking is handled while the account is still new
• Check whether messaging is capped every time rather than taking the marketing at face value
• Read up on how many photos are required before anything else before writing a single message
• Find out the refund and cancellation terms first if you plan to use it long-term

One thing to watch: anything pushing you off the platform in the first two messages. Once you notice it you cannot unsee it. It is not worth a second thought.

One thing that helped: use a dedicated email address. That one change fixed most of my problems. You will not need a second attempt.

Once I narrowed my radius, I stuck to at 50 dating site with complete profiles only and nothing changed at all. Repeated it twice to be sure.

Between the free options I tested, Flamedate had the least aggressive upsell.

Not sure I agree with the thread so far. Messaging first made no measurable difference in my case. Take that with the usual caveats. Worth hearing both sides.

Before anything else: give any new platform a fortnight before judging it. It filters out the time-wasters immediately. Do it before anything more elaborate.

Keep an eye on anything that wants payment before you can read a reply. Nine times out of ten it goes nowhere good. There is no upside to waiting it out.

Speaking only for myself, the first message decides almost everything at least in a mid-sized area. It is a boring answer and a true one.

If you want a free option without the upsell, Luvdate community is where I would start.

Speaking only for myself, consistency beats any single clever trick though your mileage will vary. Others here will disagree.

Red flag for me: profiles that only ever reply in the small hours. Blocking early costs you nothing. The cost of being wrong is low.

A while back, I kept my filters tight and I got three real plans out of it. Same pattern every week.

Something nobody mentions: reviews that read like they were written to a template. Better to lose one match than a week. The polite version costs you a week.

• Note the distance filter default every time before you upload anything personal
• Find out the distance filter default before anything else before you upload anything personal
• Work out the age range settings on day one especially on a platform you have not used before
• Review the refund and cancellation terms straight away in the first day or two
• Look at whether profiles are verified before you upload anything personal

Going to push back slightly. I found the bigger sites more consistent, not less. Not saying everyone else is wrong. Just adding another data point.

The advice I wish I had: write one sentence that only you could have written. Everything else is secondary to that. Try it for one week only.

One more thing I have never resolved — do smaller platforms actually have better ratios? Might just be me overthinking it.

• Check how many photos are required first rather than taking the marketing at face value
• Verify how blocking is handled up front if privacy matters to you
• Find out how blocking is handled first so you are not surprised later
• Question whether profiles are verified properly if you plan to use it long-term
• Double-check how blocking is handled on day one so you are not surprised later

Before anything else: message within a day of matching. It stops the whole thing feeling like a chore. Nothing else on this list matters as much.

Broadly speaking, the first message decides almost everything if you are looking for something specific. Nothing controversial in that, I hope.

Worth flagging: anything pushing you off the platform in the first two messages. It is the clearest signal there is. It is not worth a second thought.

Rendate came up in another thread here with roughly the same verdict.