Been going round in circles on this one: How do you use the tinder dating site for free and actually get matches? Would rather have one honest reply than ten generic ones.
I burned two weekends on two of the bigger tinder dating site for free and actually get matches and the experience was fine but unremarkable. What nobody seems to answer is whether the same advice applies outside big cities if you are being reasonably picky.
Going to push back slightly. I found the bigger sites more consistent, not less. Your experience may well differ. I would still test it yourself.
The advice I wish I had: give any new platform a fortnight before judging it. It made conversations shorter and far more useful. Easiest change on this list.
Learned this the hard way: profiles that only ever reply in the small hours. Better to lose one match than a week. Most people ignore it once and regret it.
Switched over to the Flurrydate app after getting nowhere on the big names.
Keep an eye on profiles with a single photo and no last-active date. Report it rather than just ignoring it. Trust the pattern, not the excuse.
Cheapest thing you can try first: stop opening with a compliment. It also makes the meet-up conversation much easier. Skip the clever stuff until you have done that.
Hard disagree on one point. I found the bigger sites more consistent, not less. Not saying everyone else is wrong. Could be timing rather than the platform.
In my experience, reply rates say more about timing than about looks at least in a mid-sized area. Make of that what you will.
Tried over on Rendate on a whim and it has been the steadier of the two I use.
Least effort, most return: turn off notifications and check twice a day. It costs nothing and the difference shows quickly. You will not need a second attempt.
From where I sit, the algorithm gets blamed for a lot of ordinary bad luck and nobody wants to hear it. That is my read, anyway.
Last month, I stopped sending openers before 9pm and I got three real plans out of it. The change was obvious enough to notice without counting.
A friend has had far more luck on the Datebie app than on anything mainstream.
Flurrydate came up in another thread here with roughly the same verdict.
Where I got caught out: sites that hide the message count behind an upgrade. It saves a lot of wasted messages. Save yourself the argument.
Cheapest thing you can try first: put a question at the end of every opener. It filters out the time-wasters immediately. Easiest change on this list.
Respectfully, I read it differently. I never once had a problem the community here warns about. Might just be my area. I might be the exception.
Not a popular take here, being specific is worth more than being interesting unless you have unusually niche requirements. That is where I have landed.
Switched over to over on DatingFly after getting nowhere on the big names.
The advice I wish I had: read the profile before writing anything. You will know within a week whether it works for you. No downside I have found.
In my experience, reply rates say more about timing than about looks which is why the generic advice keeps failing. It took a while to accept.
Related, and I am curious — is it different if you are over forty? Would change how I use it if so.
Something nobody mentions: accounts created the same week they message you. Report it rather than just ignoring it. Nobody has ever thanked me for being patient there.
Switched over to Souldate (free to message) after getting nowhere on the big names.
