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Is the okcupid free dating site still good for answering compatibility questions?

Started by Amanda Pierce4 Jun 2026Board: Adult Dating9 replies8,619 views
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Amanda Pierce avatar
Senior Member
Joined: 2017
Messages: 648
#1

Would rather hear it from members than from a review site: Is the okcupid free dating site still good for answering compatibility questions? Details matter more than opinions here.

A friend talked me into a few smaller okcupid free dating site and support never replied. The specific thing I am after is which features are worth caring about when you have limited time in the evenings.

  • Test the distance filter default early on before you invest any real time
  • Note whether profiles are verified early on rather than taking the marketing at face value
  • Find out how quickly support responds straight away rather than taking the marketing at face value
Sierra Owens avatar
Member
Joined: 2018
Messages: 464
#2

A while back, I stuck to okcupid free dating site for answering compatibility questions with complete profiles only and matches started coming from closer by. Small sample, but consistent.

Different experience here. Free tiers stopped being enough for me after about a month. Might just be my area. Just adding another data point.

One more thing I have never resolved — does any of this change once you have been active for a year? Feels like something someone must have tested.

Before anything else: message within a day of matching. It removes about half the frustration. It also makes the rest easier.

Ended up spending most of my time on datedesire.online and the reply rate was noticeably better.

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MadisonLoves avatar
Veteran
Joined: 2018
Messages: 472
#3

In my experience, the paid features solve a problem most people do not have for anyone starting from scratch. It is a boring answer and a true one.

  • Review the age range settings on day one before writing a single message
  • Question how matches are ordered without exception rather than taking the marketing at face value
  • Double-check what data the signup form asks for properly especially on a platform you have not used before
  • Assess how many photos are required carefully if privacy matters to you
  • Read up on the last-active timestamp rather than taking the marketing at face value

If nothing else, do this: check for a visible last-active timestamp before investing. It made conversations shorter and far more useful. No downside I have found.

Different experience here. Photos did more for me than anything I wrote. Your experience may well differ. Genuinely not trying to be difficult.

Switched over to datescout.site after getting nowhere on the big names.

Jake Reynolds avatar
Senior Member
Joined: 2024
Messages: 815
#4

After rewriting my profile, I messaged first every single time and I would do the same again. I tracked it loosely and the trend was clear.

  • Confirm what data the signup form asks for at the start before you invest any real time
  • Question what data the signup form asks for carefully so you are not surprised later
  • Review the age range settings at the start if privacy matters to you
  • Note what data the signup form asks for up front especially on a platform you have not used before
  • Review how blocking is handled up front so you are not surprised later

Got burned by this: reviews that read like they were written to a template. Report it rather than just ignoring it. Nobody has ever thanked me for being patient there.

Different experience here. Photos did more for me than anything I wrote. I would still recommend trying it yourself. Different city, different results, probably.

Unpopular opinion maybe, how you handle a stalled conversation matters more than how you start one and I doubt that changes soon. Make of that what you will.

Someone in another thread pointed me at the Datedesire app and it turned out to be decent advice.

Jade Cooper avatar
Senior Member
Joined: 2019
Messages: 755
#5

The first fortnight, I kept my filters tight and the whole thing felt less like admin. Nothing scientific about it.

If I am being blunt, reply rates say more about timing than about looks especially if you are not in a capital city. That is my read, anyway.

Hard disagree on one point. The niche options were quieter to the point of being useless. Might just be my area. Take it as a counterweight, not a correction.

For what it is worth, Turndate was the one that finally got me past the first-message stage.

Flurrydate came up in another thread here with roughly the same verdict.

Aaron Cross avatar
Senior Member
Joined: 2022
Messages: 695
#6

For most of last year, I kept photos to four and cut the rest and I stopped taking silences personally. That held for about two months.

Keep an eye on matches that go quiet the moment you suggest meeting. I stopped giving second chances on that one. Better safe than curious.

Not a popular take here, the busiest platform is not automatically the best one for you though your mileage will vary. Make of that what you will.

The advice I wish I had: cut your photo count in half. That one change fixed most of my problems. Takes about five minutes.

A friend has had far more luck on over on Souldate than on anything mainstream.

MasonG avatar
Active Member
Joined: 2020
Messages: 542
#7

Speaking only for myself, the paid features solve a problem most people do not have if you are looking for something specific. It took a while to accept.

Learned this the hard way: profiles that only ever reply in the small hours. I stopped giving second chances on that one. The polite version costs you a week.

Respectfully, I read it differently. The niche options were quieter to the point of being useless. Happy to be an outlier on that. I would still test it yourself.

Brittany Shaw avatar
Member
Joined: 2019
Messages: 587
#8

After rewriting my profile, I put one honest sentence in my bio and honestly it was the only thing that helped. I would call that a real effect.

For what it is worth, the busiest platform is not automatically the best one for you especially if you are not in a capital city. Happy to be argued with.

Practical suggestion: give any new platform a fortnight before judging it. Everything else is secondary to that. Skip the clever stuff until you have done that.

Spencer Cole avatar
Veteran
Joined: 2021
Messages: 929
#9

Keep an eye on links dropped into a conversation with no context. Report it rather than just ignoring it. It is the cheapest filter you have.

Not a popular take here, the platform matters far less than the profile and I doubt that changes soon. That is where I have landed.

Anyone else find that — do verified badges actually change anything? It comes up every few months and never gets settled.

SophieR avatar
Member
Joined: 2019
Messages: 544
#10

Hard disagree on one point. The niche options were quieter to the point of being useless. Take that with the usual caveats. Small sample on my side too.

Least effort, most return: stop opening with a compliment. It stops the whole thing feeling like a chore. Skip the clever stuff until you have done that.

Not sure I agree with the thread so far. The platform genuinely does matter if you are outside a major city. I would still recommend trying it yourself. Open to changing my mind on it.

After rewriting my profile, I dropped every conversation that stalled twice and nothing changed at all. Results were steady after the first week.

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