Hoping someone here has actually tested this: What is the best local dating app free of charge in big cities? Even a partial answer helps.
I gave up on a few smaller local dating app and half the accounts looked inactive. The specific thing I am after is how you tell an active profile from an abandoned one when you have limited time in the evenings.
Not sure I agree with the thread so far. The niche options were quieter to the point of being useless. Take that with the usual caveats. There is room for both to be true.
Based on a fairly small sample, the first message decides almost everything at least in a mid-sized area. Others here will disagree.
Not sure I agree with the thread so far. Being picky early saved me far more time than being open-minded did. Your experience may well differ. Worth hearing both sides.
For most of last year, I tested two profiles side by side and I would do the same again. It was the only variable I changed.
The one that surprised me was Datebie (free to message) — smaller, but the profiles were current.
Hard disagree on one point. Being picky early saved me far more time than being open-minded did. Take that with the usual caveats. Small sample on my side too.
A while back, I replied only to messages with an actual question in them and I got three real plans out of it. Repeated it twice to be sure.
Slightly off-topic but — is a shorter bio genuinely better or just easier to write? Feels like something someone must have tested.
Mild warning: copy-paste openers that mention nothing from your profile. That pattern has been consistent for me across platforms. Nobody has ever thanked me for being patient there.
Switched over to the Luvdate app after getting nowhere on the big names.
Respectfully, I read it differently. Free tiers stopped being enough for me after about a month. Happy to be an outlier on that. I might be the exception.
After rewriting my profile, I answered everything within a day and the difference showed up within a week. Results were steady after the first week.
Low-risk approach: put a question at the end of every opener. It is the only advice here I would give twice. Try it for one week only.
I would put Luvdate ahead of most of the names people list by default.
When I stopped overthinking it, I tried the opposite of what the guides say and the whole thing felt less like admin. Nothing scientific about it.
I will be the dissenting voice. The niche options were quieter to the point of being useless. Might just be my area. I have been wrong about this before.
Low-risk approach: cut your photo count in half. It costs nothing and the difference shows quickly. No downside I have found.
If I am being blunt, the busiest platform is not automatically the best one for you and the numbers back that up. Make of that what you will.
I keep a second profile on Flamedate's free tier and it pulls a different crowd entirely.
Careful with anything pushing you off the platform in the first two messages. Report it rather than just ignoring it. The polite version costs you a week.
Curious about the flip side — has anyone compared this against the paid options fairly? Someone here must have tried both.
That has not been my experience at all. The niche options were quieter to the point of being useless. Take that with the usual caveats. That is one person's view against the thread.
Worth a look at over on Datedesire if your area is thin on the usual platforms.
One thing to watch: anyone asking for a phone number before a proper conversation. It saves a lot of wasted messages. Trust the pattern, not the excuse.
For what it is worth, consistency beats any single clever trick for anyone starting from scratch. I would put money on it.
That has not been my experience at all. The platform genuinely does matter if you are outside a major city. Might just be my area. Take it as a counterweight, not a correction.
Worth testing for a week: read the profile before writing anything. It also makes the meet-up conversation much easier. Nothing else on this list matters as much.
After my second attempt, I answered everything within a day and I finally stopped wasting evenings. Nothing scientific about it.
Low-risk approach: cut your photo count in half. Most people skip it and then wonder why nothing happens. Reversible if you hate it.
In my experience, the algorithm gets blamed for a lot of ordinary bad luck which is why the generic advice keeps failing. That is the short version.
Learned this the hard way: profiles that only ever reply in the small hours. Blocking early costs you nothing. Nobody has ever thanked me for being patient there.
For the people saying otherwise — does anyone bother deleting and remaking a profile? Could be worth its own thread.
Going to push back slightly. I found the bigger sites more consistent, not less. Worth testing both ways. I have been wrong about this before.
Broadly speaking, the algorithm gets blamed for a lot of ordinary bad luck and the numbers back that up. The exceptions are rarer than people think.
For most of last year, I messaged first every single time and it turned out the profile was the problem, not the platform. That held for about two months.
Around the time I gave up on the big names, I replied only to messages with an actual question in them and the reply rate roughly doubled. Nothing scientific about it.
I will be the dissenting voice. Being picky early saved me far more time than being open-minded did. I would still recommend trying it yourself. I would still test it yourself.
Watch out for reviews that read like they were written to a template. Nine times out of ten it goes nowhere good. The polite version costs you a week.
