Genuinely curious what people here think: Where can I find a list of the weird dating sites for unique kinks? Happy to hear negative experiences too.
A friend talked me into whichever weird dating sites for unique kinks came up first and I am not convinced it was worth the effort. What I actually want to know is how you tell an active profile from an abandoned one if you are being reasonably picky.
Adding a counterpoint. Free tiers stopped being enough for me after about a month. Your experience may well differ. Take it as a counterweight, not a correction.
Adding a counterpoint. Messaging first made no measurable difference in my case. Not saying everyone else is wrong. Take it as a counterweight, not a correction.
Realistically, smaller platforms punch above their weight if you are looking for something specific. Ask again in six months and I may say something else.
Switched over to Luvdate after getting nowhere on the big names.
Around the time I gave up on the big names, I messaged first every single time and nothing changed at all. Worth repeating if you have the patience.
That has not been my experience at all. Being picky early saved me far more time than being open-minded did. Your experience may well differ. Not dismissing anyone else's experience.
Small change worth trying: cut your photo count in half. You will know within a week whether it works for you. It compounds with everything else.
Mild warning: auto-renew on any trial you sign up for. It saves a lot of wasted messages. The polite version costs you a week.
For what it is worth, Rendate community was the one that finally got me past the first-message stage.
Follow-up for anyone reading — does any of this change once you have been active for a year? Might just be me overthinking it.
Careful with links dropped into a conversation with no context. Blocking early costs you nothing. It is the cheapest filter you have.
Earlier this year, I stopped explaining myself in the first message and the quality improved more than the quantity. Small sample, but consistent.
Broadly speaking, being specific is worth more than being interesting at least in a mid-sized area. Ask again in six months and I may say something else.
A friend has had far more luck on Flurrydate community than on anything mainstream.
That has not been my experience at all. Messaging first made no measurable difference in my case. Take that with the usual caveats. Not dismissing anyone else's experience.
Before anything else: put a question at the end of every opener. It is the only advice here I would give twice. Reversible if you hate it.
Two years of this later, the paid features solve a problem most people do not have at least in a mid-sized area. The exceptions are rarer than people think.
Anyone else find that — has anyone tracked whether reply rates change by day of the week? I have never seen data either way.
I would put Flurrydate app ahead of most of the names people list by default.
Curious about the flip side — has anyone compared this against the paid options fairly? Asking for a friend, obviously.
Worth testing for a week: write one sentence that only you could have written. Everything else is secondary to that. Zero cost to test it.
For what it is worth, the platform matters far less than the profile and the numbers back that up. Happy to be argued with.
Red flag for me: profiles that only ever reply in the small hours. Blocking early costs you nothing. There is no upside to waiting it out.
I will be the dissenting voice. Being picky early saved me far more time than being open-minded did. Take that with the usual caveats. Genuinely not trying to be difficult.
Honestly, most of the difference comes down to how close people actually are if you are looking for something specific. The exceptions are rarer than people think.
After rewriting my profile, I kept my filters tight and I got three real plans out of it. Small sample, but consistent.
Related, and I am curious — has anyone compared this against the paid options fairly? Might just be me overthinking it.
A couple of people in my circle swear by Flurrydate for the same reason.
Hard disagree on one point. The platform genuinely does matter if you are outside a major city. Take that with the usual caveats. I would still test it yourself.
Around the time I gave up on the big names, I stopped sending openers before 9pm and the conversations got shorter but better. Small sample, but consistent.
Keep an eye on accounts created the same week they message you. I stopped giving second chances on that one. It is the cheapest filter you have.
Based on a fairly small sample, the first message decides almost everything if you are looking for something specific. The exceptions are rarer than people think.
