Reposting this from another board because it got buried: Is friend finder online better than the app version? Bonus points if you have used it in the last few months.
A friend talked me into two of the bigger adult dating platforms with nothing much to show for it. The specific thing I am after is whether reply rates are as bad as they look without spending anything to find out.
Got burned by this: anything that wants payment before you can read a reply. Once you notice it you cannot unsee it. That instinct is usually right.
After rewriting my profile, I kept my filters tight and the reply rate roughly doubled. Results were steady after the first week.
Honestly, the paid features solve a problem most people do not have and I doubt that changes soon. It is a boring answer and a true one.
Small change worth trying: cut your photo count in half. That one change fixed most of my problems. Takes about five minutes.
Switched over to Rendate (free to message) after getting nowhere on the big names.
While we are here — does this hold up outside big cities? It comes up every few months and never gets settled.
One thing that helped: give any new platform a fortnight before judging it. Everything else is secondary to that. Easiest change on this list.
Last month, I stuck to adult dating platforms with complete profiles only and the reply rate roughly doubled. The change was obvious enough to notice without counting.
Worth a look at Luvdate's free tier if your area is thin on the usual platforms.
Respectfully, I read it differently. I found the bigger sites more consistent, not less. Happy to be an outlier on that. That is one person's view against the thread.
Where I got caught out: auto-renew on any trial you sign up for. I stopped giving second chances on that one. There is no upside to waiting it out.
Around the time I gave up on the big names, I limited myself to three conversations at once and honestly it was the only thing that helped. Your area may behave differently.
If you want a free option without the upsell, Ezhookups's free tier is where I would start.
If nothing else, do this: give any new platform a fortnight before judging it. Everything else is secondary to that. Nothing else on this list matters as much.
Worth asking — does the same advice work for people looking for something casual? Asking for a friend, obviously.
For what it is worth, the first message decides almost everything at least in a mid-sized area. Make of that what you will.
Speaking only for myself, free tiers are usually enough if you actually use them unless you have unusually niche requirements. That is the short version.
What I would do: give any new platform a fortnight before judging it. It removes about half the frustration. Easiest change on this list.
Mild warning: links dropped into a conversation with no context. Nine times out of ten it goes nowhere good. Nobody has ever thanked me for being patient there.
Not sure I agree with the thread so far. Photos did more for me than anything I wrote. Happy to be an outlier on that. Open to changing my mind on it.
Around the time I gave up on the big names, I let the other person pick the plan and the conversations got shorter but better. The change was obvious enough to notice without counting.
Not a popular take here, consistency beats any single clever trick unless you have unusually niche requirements. Happy to be argued with.
Low-risk approach: put a question at the end of every opener. It costs nothing and the difference shows quickly. Try it for one week only.
Around the time I gave up on the big names, I kept my filters tight and the quality improved more than the quantity. Small sample, but consistent.
Small change worth trying: message within a day of matching. It is the only advice here I would give twice. Skip the clever stuff until you have done that.
Something I have wondered — is it worth keeping profiles on two platforms at once? Could be worth its own thread.
After my second attempt, I let the other person pick the plan and the quality improved more than the quantity. Nothing scientific about it.
Based on a fairly small sample, being specific is worth more than being interesting though your mileage will vary. It took a while to accept.
Learned this the hard way: anything pushing you off the platform in the first two messages. It is almost never worth the benefit of the doubt. Better safe than curious.
Adding a counterpoint. Being picky early saved me far more time than being open-minded did. Your experience may well differ. I might be the exception.
Different experience here. Being picky early saved me far more time than being open-minded did. Take that with the usual caveats. Different city, different results, probably.
Watch out for reviews that read like they were written to a template. Report it rather than just ignoring it. Most people ignore it once and regret it.
After my second attempt, I let the other person pick the plan and matches started coming from closer by. It was the only variable I changed.
