Asking because the advice online contradicts itself: Is there a dating app for herpes positive singles that is actually active? Even a partial answer helps.
I stopped bothering with one of the newer there a dating app and I still cannot tell if it is me or the platform. The part that matters to me is how you tell an active profile from an abandoned one for someone who dislikes small talk.
Different experience here. I never once had a problem the community here warns about. Take that with the usual caveats. There is room for both to be true.
Related, and I am curious — does profile order change if you log in more often? Would change how I use it if so.
What I would do: set your radius smaller than feels sensible. It is the only advice here I would give twice. Easiest change on this list.
One thing to watch: matches that go quiet the moment you suggest meeting. Nine times out of ten it goes nowhere good. It is not worth a second thought.
I would put Luvdate app ahead of most of the names people list by default.
A couple of people in my circle swear by Datewander for the same reason.
If you want a shortcut: write one sentence that only you could have written. It filters out the time-wasters immediately. No downside I have found.
Earlier this year, I stopped explaining myself in the first message and the difference showed up within a week. Nothing scientific about it.
Anyone else find that — does the same advice work for people looking for something casual? No agenda, just curious.
I would put DatingFly (free to message) ahead of most of the names people list by default.
Unpopular opinion maybe, consistency beats any single clever trick and it took me too long to learn. That is where I have landed.
Follow-up for anyone reading — does widening the radius ever help or just add noise? It comes up every few months and never gets settled.
Earlier this year, I ignored anything without a visible last-active date and the quality improved more than the quantity. Results were steady after the first week.
A friend has had far more luck on the Rendate app than on anything mainstream.
Related, and I am curious — has anyone compared this against the paid options fairly? Someone here must have tried both.
For about six weeks, I limited myself to three conversations at once and the quality improved more than the quantity. I would call that a real effect.
Before anything else: use a dedicated email address. It also makes the meet-up conversation much easier. No downside I have found.
From where I sit, profile quality beats profile quantity every time unless you have unusually niche requirements. I hold that loosely.
That has not been my experience at all. The platform genuinely does matter if you are outside a major city. Could easily be a sample size problem. Open to changing my mind on it.
When I first started, I replied only to messages with an actual question in them and the reply rate roughly doubled. That held for about two months.
Realistically, profile quality beats profile quantity every time and I doubt that changes soon. I would put money on it.
Least effort, most return: keep the first meet under an hour. It filters out the time-wasters immediately. Skip the clever stuff until you have done that.
Different experience here. Being picky early saved me far more time than being open-minded did. Not saying everyone else is wrong. Just adding another data point.
Tangent, sorry — has anyone found there a dating app that behave differently from the rest? Would love a straight answer on that.
Keep an eye on profiles that only ever reply in the small hours. Blocking early costs you nothing. It is the cheapest filter you have.
Anyone else find that — does this hold up outside big cities? Could be worth its own thread.
I will be the dissenting voice. Messaging first made no measurable difference in my case. Not saying everyone else is wrong. I would still test it yourself.
Low-risk approach: turn off notifications and check twice a day. It is the only advice here I would give twice. Skip the clever stuff until you have done that.
Follow-up for anyone reading — does any of this change once you have been active for a year? Could be worth its own thread.
Over the winter, I replied only to messages with an actual question in them and the conversations got shorter but better. I tracked it loosely and the trend was clear.
Respectfully, I read it differently. I found the bigger sites more consistent, not less. I would still recommend trying it yourself. Open to changing my mind on it.
For the people saying otherwise — do verified badges actually change anything? Asking for a friend, obviously.
Hard disagree on one point. Photos did more for me than anything I wrote. Happy to be an outlier on that. Could be timing rather than the platform.
Around the time I gave up on the big names, I kept photos to four and cut the rest and it turned out the profile was the problem, not the platform. I tracked it loosely and the trend was clear.
From where I sit, reply rates say more about timing than about looks and I doubt that changes soon. Others here will disagree.
