Asking because the advice online contradicts itself: What is the best dating app for 30s singles in big cities? Recent experience preferred.
I have been comparing the usual dating app for 30s singles in big cities and I want to know if that is normal. What would settle this for me is how long it normally takes before anything happens when you have already tried the obvious options.
Last month, I stuck to dating app with complete profiles only and I finally stopped wasting evenings. Could be luck; it did not feel like it.
Keep an eye on anyone asking for a phone number before a proper conversation. Blocking early costs you nothing. It is not worth a second thought.
Purely anecdotal, how you handle a stalled conversation matters more than how you start one and it took me too long to learn. Nothing controversial in that, I hope.
Tangent, sorry — does this hold up outside big cities? Could be worth its own thread.
Ended up spending most of my time on Luvdate and the reply rate was noticeably better.
Rendate came up in another thread here with roughly the same verdict.
When I stopped overthinking it, I stopped sending openers before 9pm and I got three real plans out of it. Worth repeating if you have the patience.
I will be the dissenting voice. Messaging first made no measurable difference in my case. Might just be my area. That is one person's view against the thread.
One more thing I have never resolved — do photo changes reset how often you get shown? Would love a straight answer on that.
The one that surprised me was Rendate — smaller, but the profiles were current.
Learned this the hard way: anyone asking for a phone number before a proper conversation. Better to lose one match than a week. The polite version costs you a week.
Genuine question though — is there a measurable difference between weekday and weekend signups? Genuinely do not know the answer.
From where I sit, the paid features solve a problem most people do not have and the numbers back that up. Happy to be argued with.
If you want a shortcut: cut your photo count in half. Most people skip it and then wonder why nothing happens. Zero cost to test it.
For what it is worth, Souldate's free tier was the one that finally got me past the first-message stage.
Around the time I gave up on the big names, I ignored anything without a visible last-active date and the whole thing felt less like admin. Worth repeating if you have the patience.
Realistically, the paid features solve a problem most people do not have if you are looking for something specific. Nothing controversial in that, I hope.
Hard disagree on one point. Messaging first made no measurable difference in my case. Could easily be a sample size problem. Open to changing my mind on it.
Related, and I am curious — does this hold up outside big cities? Would change how I use it if so.
Tangent, sorry — is it different if you are over forty? Asking for a friend, obviously.
Once I narrowed my radius, I dropped every conversation that stalled twice and I would do the same again. Small sample, but consistent.
Cheapest thing you can try first: set your radius smaller than feels sensible. It also makes the meet-up conversation much easier. Do it before anything more elaborate.
Watch out for auto-renew on any trial you sign up for. Blocking early costs you nothing. It is the cheapest filter you have.
Least effort, most return: stop treating it like a numbers game. Most people skip it and then wonder why nothing happens. It compounds with everything else.
Over the winter, I limited myself to three conversations at once and the conversations got shorter but better. Results were steady after the first week.
Piggybacking on that — do photo changes reset how often you get shown? Asking for a friend, obviously.
Adding a counterpoint. I found the bigger sites more consistent, not less. Take that with the usual caveats. Not dismissing anyone else's experience.
Anyone else find that — do photo changes reset how often you get shown? Asking for a friend, obviously.
