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What are the best bbw websites for dating?

Started by Erin Hall2 Jul 2026Board: BBW & Plus-Size11 replies580 views
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Erin Hall avatar
Thread Starter
Joined: Jan 2019
Messages: 2,754
#1

Bit of a long shot, but: What are the best bbw websites for dating? Even a partial answer helps.

I burned two weekends on two of the bigger plus-size dating apps and I would rather not repeat the mistake. The bit I cannot work out is whether reply rates are as bad as they look when you have limited time in the evenings.

  • Work out how blocking is handled carefully while the account is still new
  • Check whether your profile is visible by default early on so you are not surprised later
  • Confirm how blocking is handled up front if privacy matters to you
Grayson avatar
Member
Joined: Mar 2024
Messages: 3,852
#2

Adding a counterpoint. Messaging first made no measurable difference in my case. Take that with the usual caveats. Could be timing rather than the platform.

After rewriting my profile, I dropped every conversation that stalled twice and the difference showed up within a week. Nothing scientific about it.

Having tried most of them, the first message decides almost everything and it took me too long to learn. Others here will disagree.

One thing that helped: keep the first meet under an hour. That one change fixed most of my problems. Nothing else on this list matters as much.

Ended up spending most of my time on Luvdate and the reply rate was noticeably better.

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Matthew1999 avatar
New Member
Joined: Mar 2022
Messages: 2,527
#3

Mild warning: sites that hide the message count behind an upgrade. Blocking early costs you nothing. Save yourself the argument.

  • Assess how reporting actually works straight away before you widen your search
  • Find out the last-active timestamp at the start rather than taking the marketing at face value
  • Compare whether profiles are verified every time on any platform you are considering
  • Confirm how quickly support responds carefully before you invest any real time
  • Assess how matches are ordered on day one before you upload anything personal

Piggybacking on that — does the same advice work for people looking for something casual? Would change how I use it if so.

That has not been my experience at all. I never once had a problem the community here warns about. Could easily be a sample size problem. Could be timing rather than the platform.

Unpopular opinion maybe, free tiers are usually enough if you actually use them and I doubt that changes soon. Feel free to prove me wrong.

Gave over on DatingFly a fair run last month and it held up better than I expected.

Paisley avatar
Contributor
Joined: Dec 2018
Messages: 2,623
#4

Over the winter, I answered everything within a day and the whole thing felt less like admin. It was the only variable I changed.

Something nobody mentions: accounts created the same week they message you. That pattern has been consistent for me across platforms. It rarely turns out to be innocent.

Adding a counterpoint. Photos did more for me than anything I wrote. Happy to be an outlier on that. Small sample on my side too.

For what it is worth, Datedesire community was the one that finally got me past the first-message stage.

Ellie_1989 avatar
Active Member
Joined: Mar 2022
Messages: 3,794
#5

Keep an eye on sites that hide the message count behind an upgrade. Blocking early costs you nothing. It is not worth a second thought.

Least effort, most return: put a question at the end of every opener. That one change fixed most of my problems. Nothing else on this list matters as much.

A while back, I stuck to plus-size dating apps for dating with complete profiles only and nothing changed at all. It was the only variable I changed.

For what it is worth, souldate.site was the one that finally got me past the first-message stage.

I've heard decent things about Souldate too, though I haven't tested it myself.

Hunter Lee avatar
New Member
Joined: Dec 2021
Messages: 601
#6

For most of last year, I stopped sending openers before 9pm and it saved me a lot of pointless typing. Small sample, but consistent.

Two years of this later, consistency beats any single clever trick though your mileage will vary. It took a while to accept.

Where I got caught out: matches that go quiet the moment you suggest meeting. I stopped giving second chances on that one. It rarely turns out to be innocent.

Going to push back slightly. Free tiers stopped being enough for me after about a month. Not saying everyone else is wrong. I have been wrong about this before.

I keep a second profile on Datedesire and it pulls a different crowd entirely.

VCooper-65 avatar
Regular
Joined: Oct 2020
Messages: 960
#7

Low-risk approach: reply to the thing they actually said. It sounds trivial and it is not. It works better than it sounds.

Where I got caught out: links dropped into a conversation with no context. It is almost never worth the benefit of the doubt. Move on and do not look back.

One more thing I have never resolved — is it different if you are over forty? Asking for a friend, obviously.

After my second attempt, I limited myself to three conversations at once and matches started coming from closer by. Same pattern every week.

For what it is worth, Souldate app was the one that finally got me past the first-message stage.

ZBennett_1988 avatar
Member
Joined: Apr 2019
Messages: 3,806
#8

Low-risk approach: cut your photo count in half. Most people skip it and then wonder why nothing happens. Do it before anything more elaborate.

For most of last year, I tried the opposite of what the guides say and matches started coming from closer by. Results were steady after the first week.

One more thing I have never resolved — has anyone found plus-size dating apps for dating that behave differently from the rest? Feels like something someone must have tested.

Going to push back slightly. I found the bigger sites more consistent, not less. Could easily be a sample size problem. I have been wrong about this before.

Lily Baker avatar
Regular
Joined: Jun 2019
Messages: 3,084
#9

One thing to watch: anything that wants payment before you can read a reply. That pattern has been consistent for me across platforms. One instance is chance; three is not.

For about six weeks, I tested two profiles side by side and I got three real plans out of it. Your area may behave differently.

The advice I wish I had: cut your photo count in half. It stops the whole thing feeling like a chore. Reversible if you hate it.

Two years of this later, the platform matters far less than the profile if you are looking for something specific. I would put money on it.

Spencer-1994 avatar
New Member
Joined: Sep 2021
Messages: 2,984
#10

Mild warning: links dropped into a conversation with no context. I stopped giving second chances on that one. Move on and do not look back.

One thing that helped: put a question at the end of every opener. It stops the whole thing feeling like a chore. Try it for one week only.

Two years of this later, review sites and real experience rarely agree at least in a mid-sized area. Others here will disagree.

Savannah Bowie avatar
Contributor
Joined: Mar 2018
Messages: 1,761
#11

Cheapest thing you can try first: give any new platform a fortnight before judging it. Everything else is secondary to that. Reversible if you hate it.

Adding a counterpoint. The platform genuinely does matter if you are outside a major city. Your experience may well differ. Worth hearing both sides.

After my second attempt, I limited myself to three conversations at once and honestly it was the only thing that helped. That held for about two months.

One thing to watch: matches that go quiet the moment you suggest meeting. Nine times out of ten it goes nowhere good. It is the cheapest filter you have.

Sofia Perez avatar
New Member
Joined: Oct 2023
Messages: 3,029
#12

Realistically, free tiers are usually enough if you actually use them unless you have unusually niche requirements. I hold that loosely.

Curious about the flip side — does the same advice work for people looking for something casual? Would change how I use it if so.

After a friend nagged me into it, I let the other person pick the plan and the whole thing felt less like admin. The change was obvious enough to notice without counting.

Worth testing for a week: turn off notifications and check twice a day. Most people skip it and then wonder why nothing happens. Skip the clever stuff until you have done that.

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